The loss of a fur baby

It has been one week since my fur baby passed away. My heart feels like a piece is missing. Dante was only 8.5 years old but he had so many health issues. I never thought it would be this hard to lose a pet but my goodness, I’ve been a wreck.

Dante was born July 21, 2010 and he became part of my family on October 12, 2010. This little ball of fur was the most obnoxious puppy ever! He had it out for me, I swear! The first few months were the worst. Luckily, when I felt I couldn’t take him anymore, my mom said we were keeping him and vice versa. Dante would sit next to my bed and bark at me and then run under it if I moved to get him. I would have to throw treats out my bedroom door to get him out and then close my door.

Eventually, Dante became my baby! He was my furry best friend. My friends would make fun of me because I referred to him as my son. Anyone that has had a pet before actual kids knows that these fur babies do become like our children. Dante turned into such a chill puppy. He was always there to cuddle. Some may say he was a grumpy old man but he was the cutest.

Dante had a love for Twizzlers (thanks mom) and cat food. He had a blanket that he would carry around with him until he ate most of it. He turned his dog bed into his girlfriend and it made us very uncomfortable at times. (He would take the bed in his mouth when he was done and thrash it around).

Dante was more than just a pet, he was family. He was part of our engagement pictures AND wedding picture. My husband Marc and I treated him like a prince! When I found out I was pregnant, I made sure to get a full work up done on Dante. Everything came back normal.

Nathan was born March 10, 2017 and Dante wasn’t too pleased with the new addition. I made sure to make the transition as easy as possible on him. Dante had always slept in my bed and that was no different now that the baby was here. This is the part where my guilt starts to kick in. Dante was no longer my #1, I had a baby that needed me. I didn’t do well with dividing my attention so Dante started to cozy up to my husband.

During the summer of 2017, we noticed Dante was losing weight. He was always over weight so we chalked it up as a good thing. Then he started having accidents in the house, I figured he was acting out because of the baby. While on vacation (September 2017), my mom watched Dante and called to tell me she was pretty sure Dante couldn’t see. Once we got home, we took Dante to the vet and found out Dante was diabetic and had cataracts. I felt horrible! He had been showing signs for months but I just thought he was acting out.

The good thing was, diabetes was manageable and we caught the cataracts in time! Now we had to give him insulin twice a day and cook him meals. Dante was getting good food now! We would cook him eggs, chicken, veggies. We wanted to make sure he lived a good life even with this diagnosis.

Sadly, during all of this, we found out he had bad kidneys. We did everything we could to make sure they wouldn’t get worse. Dante started crying in pain so we gave him CBD drops. We wanted him to life the best life he could. Things just kept getting worse. We thought that the diabetes would be manageable but there was just so much more going on that we didn’t fully understand yet.

November 2018, Dante stopped eating (this is very unlike him), I even offered him a french fry! He couldn’t even keep down water. The vet told us he had a 30% chance of making it. I didn’t know how to take this. I felt like it was going to be a bitter sweet thing because he was just so much work now. My husband and I decided to try one more thing to help him. Miraculously, Dante recovered and became his normal grumpy self. We were able to spend 3 more months with him.

The days leading up to Dante passing were sad. Dante wasn’t eating and was throwing up everywhere. February 12, 2019 was such a weird day. Nathan woke up at 3:30, an hour before my alarm. He then came into my bed till my alarm went off. Usually Nathan would sleep until it was time for us to leave, but on this day, he woke up with me and hung out with Marc while I got ready. Dante was in my room and couldn’t even stand up. I picked him up and placed him on my rocking chair. As I was about to leave, my mom called and said she was running 20 minutes late. My mom is NEVER late! This gave Nathan time to say bye to Dante and I was able to hang out with him for a little before work.

During my plan at work, I called the vet. The vet tech said to bring Dante in right away and agreed that it may be time to put him down. She said everyone was shocked that he pulled through the last time. I made the decision to leave work and meet Marc at the vet. Dante was so lethargic. The vet said that Dante’s kidneys had gotten worse and that there was nothing else that could be done. He told us that we did so much for Dante and he lived a longer life because of us.

The vet tech took Dante, gave him a sedative, and brought him back for us to spend some time. While we were saying our goodbyes to Dante, I noticed his eyes moving fast and then they stopped. I was sure he passed but he gasped a few times. The vet came in with the shot but realized that Dante went on his own. I am so grateful that he was able to pass on his own and peacefully with me holding his paw. Dante will forever hold a piece of my heart. He was such a good dog. Everyday without him is hard, but I am happy that I had 8.5 years with my fur baby.